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Sometimes God's Will Sucks [02 Aug 2011|03:48pm]
Just because it’s God’s will doesn’t mean it won’t suck.

Now let me be entirely clear. I do not claim to know God’s will. I am not saying the thing/things that happened/is happening/will happen to you, the thing that keeps you up at night and makes you weep uncontrollably when you thought you were out of tears, is God’s will. Terrible awful unimaginable things happen. They are not God’s fault or his will. They are a result of the fall. As Susan E Isaacs put it “We live in a fallen world and it sucks.”

That doesn’t mean that God’s will is always peachy, good times. The cross was God’s will. Despite being the singular salvation of all of humanity, I think that if asked, Jesus himself would say “Yeah that sucked.” Being crucified sucks. Pain and fear suck. Sometimes they are necessary. That sucks too.

When a terrible thing happens many Christians are adamant that “You can’t question God.” or “You can’t be angry with God.” I call bullshit. Yes I can and will be angry and question God. As my friend Suzanne says “God can take it.” What I cannot do, is believe that my all powerful, omnipresent God could not have stopped that terrible thing. He CAN do anything. He could have turned Hitler into a toad. He could have made the planes used in the 9-11 attacks land gently atop a pile of pillows, despite anything those hijackers did.

He didn’t. I don’t know why. I do question why. I can write a list of the pretty cool things that happened in this country after those attacks. I can tell you it brought people together in a huge way. I cannot say to you, or the people who lost loved ones, “Yep that’s why God let that happen.” It is not that simple. Even if God came to me today and explained that an entire continent was better off, because of the crap thing that keeps me up at night, I wouldn’t agree with his tactics. I don’t love that continent like I loved what I lost. Nothing could justify that thing to me.

God’s ways are not our own. It’s like when I order a cheeseburger. (Now bear with me, this analogy is going to stretch the limits of my narcissism. Yes, I am comparing my diet to God running the universe.) I will order a cheeseburger, with bacon on top and fried things on the side, and then get a diet soda. Now, if you weigh 12 pounds, or have a healthy relationship with food, or hate artificial sweeteners, that probably sounds crazy to you.

You’re right, it is crazy. I am eating 1,000 calories and then saving 300 on the drink. But I know that to me, a good bacon cheeseburger is worth every single greasy, glorious calorie. A real Dr. Pepper is not worth even one. Ok, maybe just one, but certainly not 300 or more. God does things that we don’t understand, but if you can agree that God is smarter, better, and generally less crazy than me, you can assume he had good reasons.

His ways are not ours. They don’t make sense to us, but they are good. He is good. When things suck, when terrible things happen, when you are up at night weeping tears you didn’t think you had, he is still good. He is still doing good things. He has a plan for us, and is setting a path before us, but there is no guarantee that it won’t suck sometimes.
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Playing House Chapter 2 [15 Jul 2011|12:48pm]
TITLE: Chapter 2 Quid Pro Quo?
AUTHOR: new_raven
PAIRING: none yet
RATING: PG-13
WARNINGS: Violence
SUMMARY: There’s more to Chris than meets the eye.
DISCLAIMER: House and his pretty friends don’t belong to me.
SOUNDTRACK: http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL0E97EE610F950F6A&feature=mh_lolz

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Playing House [05 Jul 2011|09:39pm]
TITLE: Chapter 1 Blue Coconut
AUTHOR: new_raven
PAIRING: none yet
RATING: PG-13
WARNINGS: Drug use, language,
SUMMARY: House enlists the help of high school student to save a patient.
DISCLAIMER: House and his pretty friends don’t belong to me.
SOUNDTRACK: http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL0E97EE610F950F6A&feature=mh_lolz

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Writing again. [03 May 2011|02:55pm]
So I'm writing House fic again. I'm not sure what inspired it. I dreamed that House was my high school choir teacher and this story just took over my brain. It has nothing to do with a high school choir though. It's a lot more story and a lot less smut than my past fics. I'm enjoying it.

Do any of you still pay attention to House as a fandom? I'm having trouble finding forums or sites that are very active anymore. I was just wondering where to find a beta. Now I am wondering where to find an audience.

*hugs* Raven
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Happy New Year/Resolutions [31 Dec 2010|03:07pm]
I’ve never really done New Year resolutions. If I have they were simple blanket statements that couldn’t really be measured or tracked, much less remembered in December. “I’m going to lose weight.” With no mention of how much weight or by what methods it will be lost. I was inspired by a good friend’s resolutions for 2010 year to come up with some fun, valuable, attainable goals for 2011. This year I will be specific and intentional. I will track my goals monthly, or at least quarterly. I will NOT focus on my weight.

Resolution the First: Drink More
Yes more! This includes water, juice, tea, coffee, wine, and maybe even beer but not soda. Too often I am thirsty and I reach for diet caffeine free soda. It’s cheap and easy with no calories, no stimulants, no sodium, no nutrients, no flavor! What is in this stuff anyways? A 10 calorie cup of tea or coffee is full of antioxidants. Eight ounces of juice or even “juice cocktail” has 100% of some vitamins and minerals. Moderate alcohol, especially the red wine *happy*, is proven to help just about everything.
Specific Goals
- 2-3 glasses (16+oz) of water a day
- 1 cup/glass tea or coffee a day
- 1 serving of wine or beer at least once a week (ideally 3-7 days a week, but these are not as
cheap as tea and coffee)
I will track this on a calendar or journal. I will not bore all the interwebs with my daily fluid intake.

Resolution the Second: Use What I’ve Got
I have so much stuff. This is partially an exercise in gratitude for what I have and partially to identify what doesn’t get used and can go. Some things need to be fixed, cleaned, or filled with lighter fluid , others will need to be donated or *gasp* thrown away. I am still devising a way to track all of this. Yay spreadsheets! Perhaps next year’s resolution will be to discard or replace what didn’t get used this year.
*this resolution does not apply to formal dresses, club clothes, or costumes. I am not going to the grocery store dressed as a gothic pirate clown five times just to justify keeping the outfits.
Specific Goals
- Use each kitchen gadget at least 5 times.
- Wear each piece of jewelry at least 5 times.
- Watch all of my movies at least once. (Steve’s movies don’t count because they suck.)
I will take a full inventory and track this daily in a journal/calendar. I will track my totals on a spreadsheet monthly.

Resolution the Third: Keep in Touch
When I sent out my year end review I loved each and every response I got. I was reminded how much I love and miss you guys. The Holiday hustle and bustle reinforced how distant I have let some of you slip. That’s not ok. I love you! You are my people. So I am going to make an effort to keep up with loved ones better. This will be much harder to evaluate. I will start with more of these mass e-mails and postings and individual responses to your responses. I will start sending snail mail again. I will push out of my comfort zone and call people and try to arrange actual face to face contact when possible. I will be patient with my shy and awkward self. I will totally understand if you ask to be taken off of my mass e-mail list.
I don’t know how to track this. Maybe you will end up on a spreadsheet too.

Happy New Year!
*love and hugs*
Raven
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Year end review [17 Dec 2010|09:42am]
So it’s been a crap year. Sure there have been good things even great things this year, but the crap kind of overshadowed them. In fact if you were to weigh the pros and cons of 2010 the cons would be so heavy that the scale would topple over and land in a pile of crap just for good measure.

Even though the year has been crap, the Lord is still good.

There’s a story in 1 Kings about a woman who uses the last of her flour and oil to make a meal for Elijah the prophet. (He was a prophet right?) Because she gave the last of what she had to serve the Lord her oil and flour never ran out. That was our year financially.

No, we didn’t feed any prophets (Though we did give what we could to another Elijah) but the Lord still didn’t let us run out when we should have. When Steve lost his job we sat down, did the math, and said “Ok this is the day the money will run out”. We discussed which family members we would move in with, what we would sell, and where we would store things.

That day came and went and we didn’t run out of money. We did the math again factoring in food banks, help from our families, and everything we had cancelled and sold. We pinpointed another day when we surely would run out. It too came and went and none of our bank accounts ever went empty. God is good.

I learned a lot.
. Life without cable is not so bad. Yes we occasionally miss a TV show because we can’t record enough at once or because we forgot to put the tape in. Yes I miss Alton Brown and Myth Busters. Now when I want someone to talk nerdy to me I turn to Steve. He’s better anyways, even without puppets or explosives.

. I finally learned to make a decent pot of beans. I could also write a book on things to do with beans, rice, spam, and other food bank staples. I still don’t know what to do with canned beats. Maybe throw them at rude people?

. I learned the limits of friendship. Ultimately there are none. Friends may be the family you get to pick, but once you pick ‘em you are pretty much stuck with ‘em.

. I learned that being right doesn’t necessarily make you right. Don’t waste time being right or proud because you never know how precious that time might be.

. I learned that people don’t really change. It’s possible with enough Jesus, enough mind altering substances, or a debilitating injury or illness, but it’s not common otherwise. People may change their behaviors because they are not effective. They may have a clearer mind, thicker skin, and smaller thighs. Deep down they have the same heart, the same crazy, the same motives and priorities they always did.

. Humans are super high maintenance needy little things. That’s ok. It’s a mutual dependency and it certainly beats having to do all this alone.

I am not going to ask for a better next year. I did that in 2009 and boy have I learned my lesson. Instead I trust God. Even if next year is even worse he knows what he is doing. I am cautiously optimistic. I look forward to 2011 and whatever it flings at us, knowing that 2010 has more that prepared us.

P.S. I am not leaving out the hardest parts of the year by mistake. I frankly don’t want to talk, type, cry about them right now. I am still looking for a balance between never forgetting and always dwelling. Those we’ve lost know that they are loved and missed.
*hugs*
Michelle
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Update/Calmed Down Some [13 Jul 2010|01:59am]
So me and Jesus, we’re ok. I mean not great, but ok. He makes it kind of hard to stay mad at him. First of all you are guaranteed to be wrong. Plus you can’t just storm out and slam the door behind you. I mean you could, but he’ll still be there. He’s kinda like the money you could be saving with Geico, always there. It’s like trying to stay mad at a best friend who has taken a bullet for you, feeds you daily, and may be carrying your child. There’s just no walking away.

Jesus is doing crap in me and it’s exhausting.

God, Are you sure I’m not perfect yet? At least close enough for this decade? No? Ok. *clenches eyes in fear and raises arms in surrender* Do your worst/best.

The main indicator of this crap Jesus is doing in me is crying at church. Now keep in mind I cry at long distance commercials. I also have a pretty strong background in depression and its symptoms. This is not depression. I am not lethargic. I am fully functional and thriving in many areas of my life. I made cobbler without binge eating as my ultimate goal.

Get me in a church though and I am going to cry. I may wait till we are leaving, until we get to El Chico, or I may start before we get in the door. It really sucks. I miss wearing eyeliner successfully. Sometimes I can pinpoint why I am crying.

I really miss being thiscloseto Jesus. I don’t remember how we got that close, so I don’t know how to get back there. I am pretty sure he did all the work the first time and maybe now he wants me to step up. Other times I am so mad at Jesus I can’t even stand to look at him. This makes going to Church feel like brunch with your cheating ex and everyone you both know. Some days it’s just a song that I really like, or a song I really don’t like, and sometimes I just find myself welling up for no reason I can discern.

I decided that it was the Church we’ve been going too. We basically decided we were done with them, not going back, moving on. A few days later Jesus told me flat out that not only am I not allowed to give up on this Church I have to start getting involved and giving them a real chance. “Fix it, if you care so damned much” he quoted back to me. (Yes he said damn.) Then he pointed out that if I’m not cultivating the soil I can’t really judge the seeds being thrown at it too harshly.

So have I cultivated the soil this week? Well sort of. I’ve done a lot or praying and crying and a bit of fasting. These were all circumstantial though. I can say for sure I would not have cried or prayed as much and certainly wouldn’t be fasting at all if I hadn’t been completely desperate. I’m still mad too. I anticipate a lot of yelling in our future, but I suppose yelling is still technically praying.
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Frickin Jesus [09 Jul 2010|11:02am]
Today I feel about my God kind of the same way I feel about my president and my pastors. I really do like him. I’d have him over for dinner; he’d probably bring really good wine or an amazing dessert. I just don’t trust him anymore.

My prayers feel like a tithe that wouldn’t even buy communion wafers. They feel like my votes. One crazy liberal drop in a giant conservative bucket. I feel like I have more chances of voting someone off So You Think You Can Dance than having my most fundamental request answered.

It’s worse though because my president and my pastor, they would make everything right if they could, but they can’t because they are human and that’s ok. I know that my God can! I am left with this gnawing anger the more I realize he can and just won’t.

If Jesus is collecting our tears in a jar I’m starting to wonder if he is selling them on the black market. If Jesus is weeping with us today, even howling with us I kind of want to tell him to shut up. Fix it if you care so damn much.

Don’t get your knickers in a twist! Jesus can handle being told off. I’m sure I’m not the first or the last. I realize that my feelings are not the truth. God is still God and still perfect and whatever. His ways are not my own blah blah blah. He is right and I am wrong, but sitting here with my tiny human mind and my enormous human heart “right” still sucks!

I am not worried about offending Jesus. I am a little worried about offending people. More worried about hurting of dragging down further those who are in the middle of this tragedy. I can kind of get Jesus not answering me. We don’t hang out often. I don’t call enough. I sometimes even screen his calls, but not this family. If Jesus owes anyone a miracle it’s these people. In fact the only reason Jesus and I are still speaking is to lift them up.

Please don’t respond to this with inane bullshit about everything happening for a reason and God not giving us things we can’t handle. I may not be able to actually kick Jesus, but I can kick you.
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Where the fuck are the miracles [09 Jul 2010|12:39am]
Prayer for Max (not spell checked or edited so if typos or Jesus offend you don't read this.)

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Dietness [13 Apr 2010|10:41pm]
So I started the Ali diet last Thurs. I am not taking the pills yet, because I wanted to be sure I could manage my fat intake before starting a pill that would make me uh... sick if I ate too much fat. So far it has been phenomenally easy. Like insanely easy. Yes I'm a bit bored with salad and sometimes feel a bit unsatisfied even though I am "full", but overall this is something I can totally keep up with.

My biggest problem is that I am not eating enough fat at each meal. According to their program for my height, weight, age etc I should be aiming for 1800 calories a day with 19 grams of fat per meal. I am eating fruits and veggies and low fat everything and limited meat and cheese and I am full all the time but I am getting most of my fat at the end of the day. I am supposed to be spreading it out evenly over the day so I won't get sick.

(I really did start on Thurs just can't find the paper)
Fri I had 1110 calories with 38.5 fat grams
Sat 1602 w/ 54
Sun (the day my father in law made sausage burgers) 1807 w/ 64
Mon 1658 w/ 49

I am quite proud of myself. Not just for sticking to the diet, but because looking at Sat hasn't made me think "Hey if I can do only 1110 calories I could totally do 1000, or maybe 800, even 500." Which was always a problem in the past when I tried counting calories. (Anorexia is not a safe disease for fat people. Everyone assumes you must be eating something sometime {probably when you are alone in your room with your stretchy pants on} until you pass out in the gym.) But it is not a problem now. I am eating regularly and totally fitting in 5 a day of fruits and veggies if not more.

A few weeks ago I weighed on Granny's scale. I am currently 14lbs less on my new scale. It is yet to be seen whether the discrepancy is in the scale, because I was bloated the last time I used Granny's, or actual weight loss. I really do believe that some of it has resulted from the working out of late. The diet can only help.
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Blarg (not a merry post) [25 Mar 2010|09:06pm]
I have done none of the things I said I would do in my post a while back.

I bought some ethically traded organic chocolate and then convinced my Granny to buy me like ten $.29 clearance crunch crisps for my b-day. I bought tide cause it was on sale and I had a coupon. I have not prayed before most meals or journaled at all.

So the random pledge thing didn't really work. Maybe it was too many. I couldn't even remember them all at once. I have been buying fruit and forcing myself to eat it even though I am not a big fan. I intend to develop a taste for it by sheer force of will. So for now my one baby step I can pay attention to is 5 serving of fruits or veggies a day. (I was recently thrilled to discover it was 5 of either/or, cause I had been trying for 5 of each.)

I am currently pricing various weight loss systems, supplements, and diets. I wouldn't consider most of them for a long time because I know I already have all the info I need to loose weight. I've decided that in this case information is not power. Perhaps the motivation of some hard earned money will help.

Also

I don't think I want kids. I mean I desperately want kids, but I have decided that wanting kids is not a good enough reason to have them. I think maybe I always wanted them because everyone said kids "gave them purpose/drive/passion/joy." That's too much pressure to put on somebody who is just trying to figure out how to be person.

Collectively Steve and I have the worst genes ever. We could literally have a half blind, obese, Hannibal Lecter that dies of heart disease or cancer before the authorities catch them. I mean that is worst case scenario, but best case may just be another miserable geek.

All we have to offer a kid is intelligence and creativity and some sort of sense of humor. And even if they manage to get all of our good qualities and none of the bad they still have to deal with us as parents. Quite frankly we are both crazy. There is a decent shot that either or both of us could have psychotic break at some point, and the other probably would not function properly after wards.

All I ever really wanted to give my kids was Jesus. I just don't know if can realistically do that, and I'm definitely not gonna put all my other crap on them if I can't show them how to give that burden to Christ.

Steve refuses to even here this, because he married a women obsessed with babies, and he thinks I will get over this. He is right I will probably get over this. It may just be a freak out due to my current spiritual and a emotional state. Plus I decided right after we got married that we wouldn't even consider trying for babies until I had lost at least 50 lbs and not smoked in six months, so as to have a healthy baby growing environment and such.

This may be my subconscious giving me an out so that if I continue to suck at life I don't feel as bad about not getting what I want.
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On Being Fat [02 Mar 2010|04:07pm]
Sometimes I want to go up to other fat people in stores and ask, “What happened? How did you end up like this? Was it your dad? Were you over/under medicated? Are you literally allergic to sweat?"
They would be horrible offended and possibly mumble something about their thyroid before running away.

"Oh your thyroid. Yeah *cough* me too, yeah yeah and a hormonal imbalance, sure, of course. That explains it.”

That’s the thing though; we can’t all have a thyroid problem. Lots of folks have thyroid problems (not me) and are not 100 pounds over weight. How did we let it get this bad? Normal people gain 10 pounds, freak out, hit the gym, get back in their skinny pants and reward themselves with shoes. We gain 40 pounds, start trying to count our calories, have a “good week” with no visible results, and reward ourselves with pie.

When I say “we” I mean seriously fat people, not women with 10 or 20 pounds of baby weight, or a guy who can push his beer belly up over the same size pants he wore in college. I am not including anyone who can wear shorts for an extended period of time without third degree burns. I don’t mean people who are sad cause they don’t have Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt’s genes. I mean dangerously obese and headed for serious health problems soon. I mean actually FAT.

While we’re at it why does everyone get all quite and uncomfortable when you say someone is fat. If I you say a diabetic is diabetic that is fine. If you a diabetic is fat you get booed and hissed at. It’s not a dirty word. It’s not cruel. My clothes are plus sized. I am fat. I guess it’s like saying someone is an alcoholic. It’s only ok if you put “recovering” before it. Would it be ok I were a recovering fat person?

It is an addiction. I am addicted to food. Yes. So are you. You would go through some pretty nasty withdrawals if you never ate food again. How do you treat an addiction to something you have to have? It’s not like crack. The answer to that is “don’t do crack”. No one is going to give you crack for Christmas or take you out for crack on your birthday. You don’t discuss crack houses and crack recipes with your coworkers. It’s not easy, but eventually it is possible to get away from crack. Food not so much.

I want to get better. I want get thin, I don’t want to be Cameron Diaz, I want to be Torres from Grey’s Anatomy. I don’t want bones, or even muscles, sticking out. But to not have rolls sticking out either would be nice. It’s not really about looks though, or not just about looks. It’s about dancing and working and being able to run if the house catches fire. It’s about not having a heart attack when I am 30 or diabetes ever. It’s not enough though. I am still fat, still getting fatter, and I had a muchaco platter for lunch. The hell?

I don’t know how I got this way. I know I was always big. I know I am an emotional eater. I am aware that I have ingested more calories than I have used for about 20 years give or take. I know that eating less or burning more will result in weight loss. I know that there are a lot of stuffed crust pizzas and muchacos and cakes to be blamed, but I rarely eat those things alone, and most of the people I eat them with are not so overweight I worry if they will make it another 20 years. Some of them are actually loosing weight as I type. I am bitter that other people can eat more than me and not get fat and that I can switch to whole grains, give up high fructose corn syrup, and artificial sweeteners and I just poop more.

Diet is not the whole answer. I need to work out. I am pretty sure that is the key to all of this. Exercise. Clinically proven to increase mood and metabolism, therefore curbing emotional eating and burning more of the emotionally ingested calories. Have you ever worked out carrying an extra 150 pounds? No? Me neither, that’s why I am still carrying them. Not really I have worked out. It sucks so much and makes me so tired and sore that I don’t try again for another month.

*sigh*
I am going to stop this now. The more I think about it and type about it and the more circles I write through the more hopeless and absurd the whole thing seems. I am ok. Not flipping out. I accepted that I was fat a long time ago, I just don't really want to let it kill me or keep me from living life until it does kill me.
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Update? [23 Feb 2010|04:35pm]
Hello Flist! How are you? Are any of you still subscribed to me?

I am feeling overwhelmed. I have this enormous stack of things that need doing, improving, learning and changing. There is too much to do at once and I don't know how to prioritize saving the planet vs saving my health vs feeding my spirit vs feeding my marriage. It's like trying to teach an elaborate recycling system to people who don't take out the trash.

I need some baby steps. This is what I've come up with so far.

I want to switch to organic and fairly traded variety of whatever I can find. It's a tall order and I may never be able to find a good fairly traded bra or organic moisturizer that does anything for my psoriasis. Also I am poor and these products are often twice the price of the store brand I would typically buy. Plus an extra hour and a half of freeway driving defeats a lot of the planet saving purpose. For now I am going to commit to
. Organic fairly traded chocolate bars and cocoa powder. I'm not going to throw ot what's already in the house, but when I buy more I will invest in the good stuff.
. Cleaning products. Now that the house is stocked I can pretty easily splurge on the "green" cleaners and recyled paper towels and the like as they are needed.
. I already have a mop and duster that can be thrown in the wash rather than the trash.


I am lukewarm. There I said it. I never understood this concept. I was like "How can you be lukewarm about Jesus? It's Jesus!". I still understand how we get so complacent but I am. Praying used to happen without me ever thinking about it and now I rarely even think about it. And when I do pray its crappy and superficial. It's not even small talk. It's like we are facebook friends who haven't actualy spoken in months. It's so not ok.
. At night instead of reading I will write in a prayer journal.
. I will pray before meals. I find this a little lame, once again the only thing I have to talk about is food, but I've got to get the comunication flowing again somehow and this seems like a well defined way to start.

I have got to loos friggin weight. Seriously, if I gain another size I won't be able to shop in normal stores anymore. For every healthy thing I eat I eat something horrifically bad for me. I know we are eating better. Steve is dropping inches, but I have spare time and I fill it with cheez-its and pistachios and valentines candy. I don't work out. Ever. I mean I take a 15 minute walk home from work once a week and spend about the same amount of energy on amorous activities. That is the closest to cardio get. Ever!

I have no baby steps for this one. I know exactly what needs to be done, but have no idea how to make it happen. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
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Sylar love [06 Jun 2007|11:10pm]
I love Sylar. I know he's evil and all but my God he's pretty. I just want 5 of him.

I've just found out that I'm not the only one. Turns out many of my flist are feeling the same fondness for him that I do. It makes me so happy to see so many of you talking, writing, and viding about Sylar.

I miss the LJ.

I need a Sylar icon. I've found several that I like and then remembered I'm at a public computer where I can't save any pics. *sad*
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fan letter [05 Mar 2007|03:17am]
So the House MD message boards are collecting e-mail to send to cast. It's been ages since I wrote a fan letter. I still find myself wildly amusing. Here's what i wrote for Hugh Laurie.

Dear Hugh,

I just wanted to say that you're brilliant. You bring House to life like no one else could. This is the first television show I've watched regularly since I was a teenager. Keep up the great work.

I also wondered if you play with your awards. They could be puppets in a little dinner theatre or utube video. I was thinking the 2 SAG's could be House and Wilson... and they could kiss. Or the Golden Globe could be House and the SAG's could be Cameron and Chase arguing over who is prettier and House could mock them. Just a thought in case you get bored in hiatus or something.

Very Truly Yours,
Michelle Redford (new_raven on the HMDB)
Denton, Texas, United States

PS. Sometimes when you eat, or I guess when House eats, you look like a camel. It's adorable and has led to many inappropriate spitting references, especially in scenes with Wilson.
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Thanks [15 Feb 2007|05:11pm]
Icalyn for the v-gift

and

toadsavatar for the e-card

I'm officialy living in Denton now. I had cake and ice-cream w/ my life group fron church including coffeesnob. Tomorow dinner at a local italian place. Goodtimes.
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OC Series Heart of Stone [08 Feb 2007|05:33pm]
Thanks to zia319 for the beta.

Heart of Stone Part 1
TITLE: Dr. Stone
AUTHOR: ravenluvslex
PAIRING: none
RATING: Pg-ish
WARNINGS: patient death, original character
SUMMARY: A new doctor clashes with Dr. House.
DISCLAIMER: House and his pretty friends don’t belong to me.
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Heart of Stone Part 2
TITLE: Keeping Warm
AUTHOR: ravenluvslex
PAIRING: House/Original Character
RATING: R
WARNINGS: none really
SUMMARY: Amanda and House get stuck together at a conference.
DISCLAIMER: House and his pretty friends don’t belong to me.
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Heart of Stone Part 3
TITLE: Fake Files
AUTHOR: ravenluvslex
PAIRING: House/Original Character
RATING: NC-17
WARNINGS: smutty
SUMMARY: Amanda makes up reason to see House.
DISCLAIMER: House and his pretty friends don’t belong to me.
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Heart of Stone Part 4
TITLE: This
AUTHOR: ravenluvslex
PAIRING: House/Original Character
RATING: NC-17
WARNINGS: sex scenes
SUMMARY: House takes Amanda home.
DISCLAIMER: House and his pretty friends don’t belong to me.
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Heart of Stone Part 5
TITLE: Don’t scratch
AUTHOR: ravenluvslex
PAIRING: House/Original Character
RATING: NC-17
WARNINGS: sex scenes
SUMMARY: House gives Amanda an STD
DISCLAIMER: House and his pretty friends don’t belong to me.
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So theres this boy [07 Feb 2007|04:24pm]
I met him at the club Sunday and gave him my number and Monday he actually calls. So we met up and ended up back at his place not watching TV. Good times were had by all, bruises were made, and bite marks left, but I wasn't expecting a follow up call... at least not very soon.

But Tuesday he called again. So there was a second "date". In two days. Two dates in two days. *flails about*

It went well. He's real cute. He's very into the Anime. We watched some Anime fan vids, and 4 or 5 eps of Noratu? (I so spelled that wrong) and some Invader Zim, and the end of House. He remembered I like House. We drank hot tea and he gave me dark chocolate. Good man.

There was some showering. Now I smell like a boy. Just every now and then I get a whiff of myself and I smell like him and his boy flavored body wash and it's not totally unpleasant. My bra, however, is going to be incredibly uncomfortable for a few days.
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shamless ploy for some lovins [05 Feb 2007|05:25am]
My Valentinr - new_raven
Get your own valentinr
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*loves* [28 Jan 2007|09:50pm]
I love House. I just love him. and I love this vid by bodaciousduck4 on youtube.

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